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It’s important from birth to around age 3 that the family environment maintains itself as loving and consistent–that is, free of chaos.
Parents who aren’t self-knowing, grounded, and ready to raise a child have trouble delivering consistent, loving and patient nurturing to their child.
Rather than nurturing their child’s sense of self, these parents used their child to attempt to uplift their own vulnerable ego. Ideally, every baby born into this world is surrounded by unselfish, patient love and nurturing from at least one or two parents.
The working out of those specifics might be where your attention is going to be productive. Al-Anon is not for everyone in your situation, but those who do find it helpful would probably say that it’s the repeated attendance that makes it work.
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I receive a lot of emails from people who are in a relationship with an adult child of alcoholics.
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